Fitrah Bersedih

S.E.D.I.H

everybody in this world has that phase.  when something or someone made you overwhelmingly sad. even though you know that it all comes from Him,but still rasa sedih tu. takpe, itu fitrah. it's not wrong for us to acknowledge that fitrah. 

but personally, I don't like it much. the being sad part. somehow it seems like kita tak redha dengan apa yang Allah bagi kan? not to say that we can’t vent all those feelings out.  boleh je.  menangis la kalau nak menangis. tumbuk lah dinding ke ape. kick anything that you want to (oke, ade la exception kan.  maybe your innocent roommate. hehe).

unleash your feelings outside with all those things if you want to, but never inside. because in your heart, you have to always make sure you're willing that all of that is happening to you. because it's His Qada' and Qadar. because it's His Plans to begin with. 

*****

'repeat' 're-sit' 'fail' 'compensate'; the common vocabs dreaded by many. but after 3 years in the medical field (studying I would say) I learn to accept that life now is full of unexpected things. no matter how much we want or dread certain things, if Allah has chosen it for us, the best and the right thing we should do is to make the best out of it. 

friends dropping out, resiting papers, repeating years, changing courses, heading back home and all. I pray for those who are facing all these; may Allah be with you through and through. and we all have heard of the saying that goes: "what doesn't kill you will only make you stronger". and I truly believe that all hardships that Allah gave us are to strengthen us.

strengthening our keyakinan (assurance) in His Plans.

strengthening our tawakkal (trust) in His Plans.

strengthening our iman, 

for it's the only thing we're bringing back with us in the Afterlife.

when I feel down and low, or when I feel lost at times for the things that I'm doing, my Mak and Ayah kept on reminding me that I should keep doing my job ;  which is to put my best effort forward; in anything that I do. and the truth is, the only thing that we can measure relatively is just our efforts. and the rest?  it is for Him to decide. all the endpoints are in His Hands. trust Him, I think that's what He wanted most from us.

Then I realized, tak malu ke Allah tengah tengok? of how I was so preoccupied with the sadness that I am feeling. crying over something that I couldn't get, and forgetting the rest of the things that I am getting.  that many others dont even have. *MAJOR SIGH..*

ever wondered why are we sad in the first place?

ask ourselves; 

how can we be so sure that getting what we want will make us happy? 

how can we be so sure that getting what we want will make all things easier?

are we sure that getting what we want will make us closer to Him?

and what's worse, some ends up 'merajuk dengan Allah'. where we would end up doing less things for Him. kurang solat sunat, kurang baca Quran, kurang berdoa pada Dia. why? because we think it's unfair for Him to put this heavy burden/ujian on us. naudzubillah.

nak merajuk dengan Allah?  think again people. He has the ability to give you anything that you want, and even more; in just a blink of an eye. so when He Decided not to Give you something, He always has His Reasons. and it's always for our own benefit. the only thing we should do is just to believe in it.

 that's all.

“Dan Apabila hamba-hambaKu bertanya kepadamu (Muhammad) tentang Aku, maka katakanlah sesungguhnya Aku dekat. 

Aku mengabulkan doa orang yang memohon 

apabila ia memohon kepadaKu. 

Maka hendaklah mereka memenuhi (panggilan/perintah)Ku, dan beriman kepadaKu agar mereka mendapat petunjuk (bimbingan)”. 

(2: 186)

yours truly,
done crying. am trying :)

Senior 4th Year Meds School, Tanta University